Balancing Your TRIBE(s)

When I turned 4 years old, my parents signed me up for every activity that fit my qualifications: cheerleading, ballet, art classes, etc. By the time I was 10, I started joining activities and organizations voluntarily and doing so, I met tons of friends that I still keep in touch with at age 23.

Having friends from all walks of life is fun and easy until ... it's time to link up.

There will be friends who don't like to meet new people.

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There's always that one friend who wants you all to herself.

Luckily, the 'peacemaker friend' will be present to spread better vibes and ease the tension.

If your recent birthday weekend or outing with your combined TRIBE(s) wasn't a success, here's what to do:

Start a group chat.

Inform your friends about the next event in a group message. You don't have to talk everyday, just let your friends know the details and allow them to meet. Everyone can get a feel for each other so they won't walk into any situations blindly.

Handle disputes privately.

Never fight in the group chat! It will only begin the games, "Who's Right or Wrong?" and "Don't Talk to My Bestfriend Like That!" Call the person you're in disagreement with, and handle it without involving the other women in your TRIBE. Remember, sis: respect is one of the major keys to success. If someone rubs you the wrong way while out in public, make a mental note about it. Enjoy the event, and talk to your friend later when there's down time.

Practice discernment.

You don't have to be close to someone because your BFF is. If you vibe well, it's a win! If you don't, it's not a loss. Keeping an associate-level relationship is better than falling off completely. Notice behaviors and patterns early so you'll know how to determine boundaries.

Learn how to let it go!

Ever ignored someone for so long, you forgot what you were upset about? Let it go. That grudge? Let it go. We need our TRIBE(s). Don't throw yours away.

Gather your TRIBE(s) and celebrate life. Watch your friendships flourish.